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The itch seemed to appear out of nowhere.  It started small, a tiny annoyance, just below his left ear, that seemed to come and go of its own accord.  But over the last few days, they itch had gone from a slight annoyance to an overwhelming pain.  He felt like one of those dogs with large ears that flopped when they scratched.  Except he didn't have large ears.

Russell sat down for his typical lunch of pickled herring and gorgonzola cheese, with a cup of lemonade.  He had made it half way through his lunch when his itch reared its ugly head.  His appetite disappeared and Russell began itching with a furious fervor.
It wasn't until that evening, upon undressing for his evening shower, that Russell discovered the rash.  A red patch, the size of a golf ball had appeared on the side of his neck.  It was flaky and oozing and extremely sensitive.  Russell felt around a bit and eventually found a hard portion in the center of the sore.  Russell washed his hands and climbed into the shower, worried.

Russell's dreams that night were disturbing, to say the least.  In his dream he was a land crab, but blue.  He scurried from one garbage can to the next.  The city in which he lurked, eating from one can and the next, was extremely large and very corrupt.  Russell the crab gorged himself on the contents from nearly every can.  With each indulgence, Russell grew larger, until finally the animal control service captured Russell and served him for dinner at the annual city crab feed.  The city raised $125,000 that night for cancer research.  Russell woke that morning feeling even more disturbed.

Rising from bed and shuffling into the bathroom, Russell discovered that his golf ball sized sore had all but disappeared.  Only smooth skin remained.  But still, just under the surface of the skin was a smallish, but now recognizably rectangular hard spot.  Russell called his doctor for an appointment.

That afternoon Russell entered the office of Dr. Sahmed Khaliharri, M.D. greeted by Janis, the usually dour receptionist.  Moments later Russell was escorted into an examination room, to be greeted by Dr. Khaliharri and one additional doctor, who remained nameless, as he was unintroduced.  Dr. Khaliharri fingered Russell's neck protrusion and offered a topical ointment.  The other doctor leaned forward, classes his throat, whispered into Dr. Khaliharri's ear and abruptly left the room.  Russell thanked the doctor for his time, adjusted his collar and exited the examination room. But Russell never made it home.

Russell spent the next six months strapped to a hospital bed in a secret government medical facility one mile beneath a desert in Nevada.  An Ethernet cable had been plugged into the small port that had grown out of his neck.  Within one month the government had managed to download four exabytes into Russell's brain, with no apparent ill side effects.