A Repertoire of Excellence Crippled by a Singular Weakness

 

Born about a year and a half after his sister, Hampton proved himself superior at every opportunity, learning quickly, excelling far beyond his peers, and displaying the remarkable gift of a strong mind and understanding in every field imaginable. In sports he was gifted, in music he excelled, in academics he exemplified a quick and agile mind that revealed no modicum of struggle or confusion. His work ethic put all others to shame, taking the initiative with multiple opportunities to earn an income, even before reaching his teenage years.

A stunningly handsome young man, which proved to be both a gift and a curse. While not one given over to vanity, he knew and understood who he was and what he had, to still struggle with normal social interaction with his peers, especially those in the female category. Like one who desired to look at the back of one’s own head, while impossible to achieve, Hampton could see his weaknesses but only slightly recognize his incredible talents, gifts, and abilities. His social inabilities were a bane to him and a struggle that he could not overcome.

Genuinely loving those who loved him, he still found a thrill in tormenting and teasing those closest to him, stirring up slivers of animosity but also feelings of endearment, as no matter what he said or did, he was loved by all. His life and interaction were a maelstrom of conflicting words and actions, sometimes angry, sometimes kind but always passionate, seeking to find a connection in a world that did not understand him, and one that he in return did not understand.

Not one to accept limitations or failure, he threw himself into art, refining his skills with hours, days, weeks, and months of practice, again proving himself unconquerable at yet another endeavor. Touching into a wide variety of musical influences, he weaved together an approach to creation that melded two seemingly incongruous genres, creating a beautiful new category of music as of yet unheard.

Everyone he knew, everyone who knew of him, and everyone with whom he interacted could see his remarkable and incredible talent, even when he refused to believe in himself as someone special and gifted. Not one to be content with his growing collection of hobbies, interests, and fields of expertise, he next threw himself into mechanics, finding yet another niche to learn, to understand, and to conquer.

Those who knew him well understood that his mind was not one to be distracted or content with maintaining its current level of understanding or activity. Like a rocket on a launching pad but somewhat chained in place, hungry for the next effort, he moved from one field to the next, adding more and more to his never satisfied passion to grow and learn, a mind racing and ever looking for the next topic to understand and conquer.

With a heart of gold and a love for everyone he met, he deeply desired to connect, to grow, to learn, on a path of never ending self improvement. Yet within that remarkable boundary of Hampton in the flesh, struggled an insecure young man who longed to connect and understand himself and others, yet being completely oblivious on how to do so. His frustration continued to build, as he ultimately learned that this field was one in which he could not excel.

Nearly all of his loved one’s could see his phenomenal character, his remarkable abilities, and his passion for  being a good person, willing to give up anything for anyone, yet there were those who were like him who could not see his struggle, and they too, like him, struggled with doing what they could to overcome their own weaknesses, eventually coming to an understanding too late to help him overcome that one thorn that pierced him through.

As the last few years ground by, those who should have been directing and guiding him, were doing so but were leading him down a path that would lead to his final destruction, the loss of a beautiful, loving soul, struggling to find his place, to find joy, to find contentment and acceptance but failing to do so because of inexplicable details that defined him. The decline was a time of agony, of confusion, of struggle, and of frustration, as many terrible choices were made, words of guidance were offered, and those who should have loved and accepted him failed to do so, trying to force a square peg into a round hole.

Like standing on the shoreline and watching a small boat drift away to eventually disappear on the horizon. The body of the boat became smaller and smaller until finally the mast disappeared altogether, leaving a horrible ache, grief, and despair where there should have been assistance, devotion, and intervention. Movement down a particular path had begun and there was no easy return or change possible, leaving all of those who loved him feeling helpless and overcome with grief, betrayed by their own foolishness and lack of foresight.

He was loved, he was helped in the way they thought was the best that they could offer, and everything possible was done to lead him to recovery but unable to see a path forward, decisions were made that could not be undone, destroying all possible opportunities for resolution and healing. Like watching a large boulder roll down a hillside, some could see the inevitable conclusion that was sure to follow, all of them irreparably damaged when the end finally arrived with a phone call.

There was no longer an opportunity to give the one last hug, words of encouragement, or offers of possible change of trajectory. An emptiness filled every soul that knew and loved him, all were overwhelmed with despair and grief, and some were filled with self-hatred and self-loathing, devastated at their own foolishness and inability to see beyond their own struggles to help Hampton through his own.

There would be no more music, no more art, and no more conversations about cars and pets and future possibilities. A gaping wound had been opened up, leaving a hollow space that could never be filled, for there would never be another Hampton, a beautiful young man with so much potential to be, to create, and to overcome, pouring out his love and compassion on everyone he met. It was an inexcusable loss, leaving the world a much worse place with his absence.