Accomplishing Much, Accomplishing Little

 

                Robert and Mary married young, having become sweethearts in high school and throughout university, they both pursued the path of corporate success and growth, waiting until they were in their early thirties before having children. The decision was made for Mary to step away from her job after they learned that she had become pregnant.

              They had built up an impressive financial cushion for themselves, making life relatively easy to continue with only Robert’s income. With the birth of Richard came excitement, joy, a new sort of busy and a new set of responsibilities. Two years later, Mary became pregnant again, and they watched their family grow from three to four with the birth of Jonathan. Mary beamed with joy at her success of providing two sons for she and her husband.

              “I’m excited to see what kind of men Richard and Jonathan become,” she said.

“This is a huge responsibility to raise two new humans to follow the path of success,” Robert answered. “I know we’ll do just fine. When you consider how well we’ve progressed in all things important.”

Richard began to develop his role of big brother very early on, doing his best to train, influence, and guide Jonathan in everything he considered important. Both boys embraced the practice of leadership, sportsmanship, and teamwork. Taking on small jobs as soon as they were old enough, they both became part of the baseball team, the basketball team, the chess club, and student government all throughout high school.

Jonathan watched Richard graduate, feeling proud of his brother’s achievements. Seeing him off to university, they stayed in contact, encouraging one another, sharing facts and achievements and challenging one another to take on new adventures and areas in which to better themselves. As Jonathan reached his final year of high school, he began to ask questions about what was truly important and how to make himself a better human being.

Following in his brother’s footsteps, he too began university, pursuing a degree in criminal law, aiming for the goal of finding justice, correcting the many wrongs in the world, and committing to put time and effort into helping those who were impoverished by a system that took advantage of their misfortunes and cultural differences.

As Jonathan completed his second year of university, he traveled across the state to attend his brother’s graduation. Richard had earned a degree in business, to receive a job offer from a major corporation. With these two events taking place, Richard began his path of pursuing wealth, comfort, the dating world, and mastering the skill of investment for his company and for himself.

Jonathan watched in sadness as Richard continued on this path, a path that was radically different than the one he was beginning to pursue. Jonathan knew that four years of university would not be enough to reach his goals, so he pushed further forward to earn his PhD in law. As he announced his plans to his family, he received a phone call from Richard the following weekend, warning him about taking on too much debt from student loans.

Jonathan convinced his brother that he had no concerns about debt and would earn more than enough money to pay off the loans within ten years. As he continued his academic path, he met a young lady at the coffee shop he regularly frequented, sharing his ideas, his plans, and his goals. To learn that he and she were nearly identical in their thoughts about money, about people, and about making a difference in the world.

After six months of dating, Jonathan and Alice from the coffee shop, made their relationship official. He proposed and received a yes, with plans for the wedding to take place after he earned his PhD. Between her modest income and his part time job, they lived comfortably and dreamed of the day when their marriage would be final. Alice suggested that they move in together, in order to save money by having only one rent to pay instead of two.

Jonathan disagreed, saying that because they were not married yet, the marriage needed to bring about a change in their relationship. Moving in now would take away the special moment of two becoming one when they married. He helped her out financially whenever he could, pouring himself into the relationship with transparency and honesty, maintaining a connection of trust and making future plans.

The day of graduation finally arrived and shortly thereafter Jonathan received a job offer that paid even more than he imagined he would earn. Within two weeks of graduating, they set a date for the marriage ceremony. Knowing that many decisions would need to be made, that their families would need to send out invitations, and knowing that scheduling for the ceremony too soon would make all of this that much more difficult.

With only three months to make all of their decisions, Jonathan and Alice worked hard to bring everything into line. The day finally came when Jonathan watched Alice walk down the aisle, holding onto her father’s arm. He could see his brother as his best man standing to his left, as well as the other three groomsmen with him. The ceremony was glorious and beautiful, accompanied by a small ensemble of violins and cellos.

Jonathan and Alice spoke their vows, exchanged rings, and kissed as husband and wife for the first time in the presence of a massive gathering of family and friends. They walked back down the aisle and entered the large room for music, drinks, and great food. Enamored with his beautiful, new bride, Jonathan could see Richard lingering about with a girl far younger than he. “That is not a good path there Richard,” he muttered to himself.

“I’m sorry, Jonathan, what did you say?” Alice asked. “I was just commenting to myself that Richard is on a bad path. He continues to date these girls that are much younger than him. He won’t find true joy or happiness that way. It seems like he has a different girl every time I see him. Honestly, he never actually looks happy.”

“Yeah, I agree,” she said. “He certainly doesn’t have what we have. He’s made a lot of choices over the years and none of them seem to be for the best.  I don’t think there’s anything we can do at this point.”

According to plan, Alice quit her job at the coffee shop, Jonathan paid off his school debt within ten years and they watched four children enter their life, bringing with them immeasurable joy and satisfaction. They maintained connection with their families, watched everyone around them grow old, feeling incredible grief over the lifestyle that Richard had chosen.

“He’s really just a sad, old man now,” Jonathan said. “It is really frustrating to have the answers, to see the path to joy and truth, and know that others simply won’t listen.” Richard is destined to be alone, and he has waited too long to find someone with whom to spend his time and money.”

“Yeah, we’ve had this conversation many times,” Alice said. “There is nothing we can do for him.”

“The joy that you have brought me cannot be measured by any financial means,” he said. “You and the kids have fulfilled me in ways that nothing else could. Sadly, we’ll watch Richard grow older and older, alone, frustrated, sad, and empty.”

“Let’s just focus on raising our kids, being a good influence upon those who are willing to listen, and always do what is right,” she said. “We can form our kids to be good people, to make good decisions, and to sacrifice for others.”

They watched their children grow, finish school, finish university, marry, and have children. “Our family is growing in incredible ways,” Jonathan said. “We have made an impact on this world in ways that Richard never did or could. His focus on wealth and comfort only left him alone.”

Jonathan arrived home on a Thursday afternoon to find Alice in tears at the kitchen counter. “Honey, I’ve got really bad news,” she said. “Your mother just called and said that Richard took his own life, leaving behind a note that said that he no longer saw any purpose in continuing what he was doing.”

“Damn, I did not see that coming,” he answered. “I wish we could have done more for him.”

“We did all that we could,” she said. “If someone begins down a path based on wrong assumptions, there is usually nothing anyone can do to help redirect that. Your mother said that the funeral would be next weekend.”

Jonathan, Alice, their four children and their spouses and their multiple grandchildren sat together with his parents. “This is so sad, Alice,” he said. “There is literally no one else here but family. I guess that means that Richard never connected with anyone in any meaningful way. All of those women over all of those years and none of them are here.”

“He chose of a path of pleasure and comfort, using people for what he wanted, and this is all that he is left with,” she said. “We’ll need to carefully talk about this with our kids and grandkids. A life that is lived for only self leads to this kind of emptiness and solitude.”

After the funeral, Richard’s lawyer approached Jonathan, inviting him to his office on the following Monday. “I wanted to inform you that your brother left you all of his money and possessions. You’ll need to come to my office to fill out the appropriate paperwork. The office opens at nine. Call then and make an appointment.”

Jonathan and Alice drove home, discussing the surprise of such an act on Richard’s part. “I think that we should divide up the money between our kids and grandkids. This last act on Richard’s part is a great act of kindness that is surprisingly unlike the rest of his life. I have no idea how much money he has, so this will be interesting. What a sad way to end this relationship.”

“That is so like you, Jonathan,” Alice said. “I would not have expected anything different from you. I like that idea.”